Best Headline Ever

From Fred Klonsky's blog:

Gingrich calls Sotomayor a racist. Bloomberg, Klein and Sharpton welcome him as an education reformer.

Blogoversary!

NYC Educator is four years old today. Here's the very first post, reflecting a viewpoint that sorely disappointed some of my friends at the Independent Community of Educators. I didn't get around to mentioning class size till post number two.

Here's one of my favorites, from a time before the 2005 contract shocked me. Here's an optimistic post about the advent of Edwize, something I thought would really help counter the nonsense on the tabloid op-ed pages.

Like many UFT members, I'd never have imagined they'd come up with such a stinker of a contract, or that any sentient being would actually support it. At that time, I'd written for NY Teacher on several occasions, and was in negotiations to begin writing for Edwize. I was going to fold this blog and do so. Curiously, when I began opposing the contract on a daily basis and leaving disparaging comments on Edwize, that invitation was unceremoniously withdrawn.

A few months ago, though, NY Teacher amazed me by reprinting a piece I'd posted about Michelle Rhee. My favorite stories are the ones about kids, and I stay anonymous so I can keep writing them.

I want to thank everyone who's read the blog, and everyone who's commented. Special thanks to Schoolgal, who fed me tips for the longest time and supported this blog when almost no one else was reading it. It's been a thrill to meet some of the people who've emailed me (I can't believe who some of them are) and to receive responses from some of the people I've emailed.

Thanks to all! It's been a thrill and an honor to write this blog, and I ain't finished yet. I've learned a lot, and I learn more every day.

The Teacher's Friend

Miss Cellania finds a computer that's truly user-friendly.

Keep a Good Thought

Frank McCourt, ex-NYC teacher and one of my very favorite writers, is being treated for cancer. On the brighter side, they say he's doing "pretty well."

What Makes Shelly Run?

God bless Democrats. If it weren't for Democrats, we'd have no one to blame but Republicans every time some bonehead went out and did something patently idiotic. Fortunately, we have politicians from both side of the aisle who are equally tone-deaf to the needs of the people. That's why NY Assembly Speaker Shelly Silver supports mayoral control, with a few superfluous revisions that will ultimately mean nothing whatsoever.

Silver's plan, presented along with Assembly Education Committee Chairwoman Catherine Nolan (D-Queens), would not mandate set terms for panel members...

So essentially, if any of his appointees were to disagree with Mayor-for-life Bloomberg, he could fire them before they actually voted. The big change Mr. Silver proposes is that two of the eight members the mayor would choose would have to be parents. Thus, if Mr. Bloomberg were to fire a parent, he'd have to replace that parent with another who agrees with him. Of course, the chancellor would no longer chair the PEP, so someone else would have to wield the rubber stamp.

And, of course, the chancellor would have some very demanding duties:

The schools chancellor...would be required to visit each school district every two years.

Boy, that will really burn the rubber off those limo tires. You mean the chancellor would have to visit the schools he adminsters once every two years? Or at least the districts they're in? Does that mean they can stop for sandwiches or do they actually have to set foot in a school? And what if there are no good sandwich places nearby?

Doubtless the chancellor is quaking in his Florsheims.

A better idea, of course, would be to have people like Mayor Bloomberg themselves compelled to patronize the schools they run--let's dump him and require the next mayor have kids in the schools. Let's require the next chancellor have kids in the schools.

Because until we do that, what we have is very much akin to a billionaire residing in California governing New York. Why should he give a damn about things happening so far away?

Hard Times in the City

NYC Costco stores begin accepting food stamps.

If You Read One Thing Today...

...read about Mayor Bloomberg's new governance plan over at NYC Parents Blog. Well, you've already read this, so perhaps it's two things. I'll stop now before things get more complicated.

The UFT Values Your Opinion

A teacher emailed me to tell me about a telephone call he got. Would he answer a few questions about politics and education? Of course he would, but who was calling, please?

It was some company from Arizona, and no, they couldn't provide any funding information. But the questions they asked made him suspect it wasn't Mayor Bloomberg's money machine after all:

How do you feel about Michael Mulgrew?

How do you feel about Leo Casey?

Could it be Randi Weingarten is contemplating giving up her part-time gig as leader of the largest teacher local in the country?

But then it got interesting.

How do you feel about paying for health care?

Perhaps if you pay 3% of your salary for health care, Ms. Weingarten and her crack negotiators could get us a 4% raise. Maybe if you give 4%, they could up the raise to five!

How do you feel about charter schools?

How do you feel about seniority?

If this doesn't give you an inkling what negotiations look like, I don't know what else to tell you. They also asked:

Would you like the UFT to settle before the election or after?

That's a tough question. Is it better to give up the ship now, or later? Hmmm...

Here are some questions they didn't ask:

Would you like to get back the August punishment days?

Are you tired of teaching the sixth class that is not a class?

Is potty patrol getting any less degrading?

Compliments, Offhand and Otherwise

"What's the matter, Mr. Educator?" asked one of my students.

"Well, I saw Francine before. She said hello to me and we talked a little. And look, now she's not in class."

"That's confidence," she said.

***

Another of my students was talking to his friend during a writing test.

"Are you crazy?" I asked. "You're supposed to be writing, and you're talking to him."

"Well, I was finished talking to him and ready to write, but now I'm talking to you."

I love the way any kid in the world can turn around any situation at all and make it the teacher's fault.

***

The best, though, was that while I was correcting a paper, a student walked up and wrote something on the board. Later I turned and looked.

It was a little smiley face, and next to it was written, "I love being in this class."

What's With All This Market and Money Stuff?

As a teacher, you've never had any money to speak of, so you have no idea. But fret not, as Trashman explains it all.

Mr. Bloomberg Gets All International

I'm just listening to Spanish TV, and Mayor Bloomberg is on. Now I'm a gringo who speaks Spanish with an American accent, but hizzoner really makes no effort whatsoever to sound the way the language does, and sounds ridiculous to even my less-than-perfect ear.

I should probably be more tolerant, like I am with my students. On the other hand, they're just kids trying to get by, while the mayor is an outrageous opportunist who's blatantly defying the twice-voiced will of the people.

It's not just his deliberate perversion of the term-limit referendum. Mayor Bloomberg, a lifelong Democrat, ran as a Republican when he realized even all that money was not going to buy him the nomination eight years ago. Then, wanting to be President, he dropped his GOP registration, hoping to wrest the "maverick" designation from Johny McCain. When polls told him he had no shot at the presidency, he went back to the GOP, cash-filled hat in hand, and worked something out. The party bosses may have been in a snit, but there was no way they were going to advance another candidate with the remotest chance of winning.

So now Mayor Bloomberg is trying to convince Spanish speakers that he cares about them. I hope they aren't as gullible as we English speakers are. Unless you're a team owner or Eva Moskowitz, you and your kids have little chance of benefitting from his continued tenure as mayor.

Mr. Klein Chooses a Staff Member

I've been forwarded the below message from Chancellor Klein. The person who sent it states that Santiago Tavares was not rehired by the Central Park East 1 community for a second year due to an inability to handle curriculum even with a great deal of support. So much for "accountability."


Still, it's good enough for the kids who trudge in the dark to trailers in Mayor Bloomberg's New York. And fortunately, it's only "Teaching and Learning," not sports stadiums or anything important.

Dear Colleagues,

I am writing to tell you that Dr. Marcia V. Lyles will be leaving the New York City Department of Education to become the Superintendent of Christina School District, the largest public school district in Delaware. Over the past two years, Dr. Lyles has applied her three decades of experience here in New York City to dramatically improve the quality of teaching and learning in our schools. Her work, especially with our middle schools, has been extraordinary. She is a fighter for equity and excellence in public education. I know we’ll all miss her here in New York, but I know that her talent and expertise will mean great things for the students of Delaware.

When Marcia leaves in June, Santiago (“Santi”) Taveras will become the interim-acting Deputy Chancellor for Teaching and Learning. He is the right person to contin ue the work that Marcia has done so well. Santi began his career in New York City’s schools as a teacher at Central Park East I Elementary School. He is the founding principal of the Banana Kelly High School and the Urban Assembly Academy for Careers in Sports, both in the Bronx, and served as the Instructional Superintendent in Manhattan’s Region 9. He currently serves as the City’s Senior Supervising Superintendent, where he oversees the Department of Education’s community and high school superintendents.

Please join me in congratulating Marcia and welcoming Santi to his new role.

Sincerely,

Joel I. Klein

The Even Odder Couple

It appears, despite the remarkably effective PR machine driven by Mayor Bloomberg, that parents are not persuaded he needs total control with no checks or balances. It's not all bad news for Mayor Mike, though, because he's now got Shelly Silver, Malcolm Smith and Randi Weingarten in his unusually deep pockets.

Call me cynical, but isn't it entirely possible that some backroom bargaining took place to enable that? I can't speculate on what Mayor Bloomberg may have offered Silver or Smith. But if we have indeed purchased a contract, and the mayor is not opposed by the UFT, we will have paid an extremely high price for something, given past history, we should be entitled to as a matter of course.

When we took zeroes, when we offered outlandish givebacks, when we gave up time, days, rights, perks, and whatever else Joel Klein wanted from us, we were told it was because there was a pattern. In fact, PERB said we had to take the pattern, that pattern bargaining was crucial, and that the world would more or less grind to a halt if we didn't take the pattern.

In fact, when we last took zeroes, the pattern was based on a fraudulent vote by DC37, one that sent its leaders to the hoosegow. No one raised a peep, and no one tried to renegotiate as city workers got nothing during the biggest economic boom in recent memory.

Now, there is a pattern--4% one year, and 4% the next, set as usual by DC37. So here's the question--do we follow the pattern when the city doesn't find it convenient? And if we do, does it come at the price of failing to oppose the most anti-teacher, anti-public education mayor we've seen in out careers?

Only Ms. Weingarten and Mr. Bloomberg know for sure.

Mike Bloomberg, Truth Teller

Mayor Bloomberg has finally let parents know what they can do about his policies regarding the education of their children--they can back off and butt out. There's a big debate over mayoral control going on right now, and Mayor Mike wants parents to shut the hell up, leave him alone, and let him do whatever the hell he wants. That's fairly evident in the current setup, with an educational board in which he controls the majority and fires anyone who doesn't agree with him.

Parents. of course, are free to criticize the schools and teachers. That's fine. But criticizing the mayor's policies, which are perfect in every way, will not be tolerated. Teachers are accountable. Schools are accountable. But Michael Bloomberg, the richest man in New York City, can overturn the twice-affirmed will of city voters, and if they don't like it, they cannot even lump it.

Personally, I've always felt that was more or less Mayor Mike's attitude toward parents. I've long known it was his attitude toward teachers. But as a frequent critic, I have to give the mayor credit for letting parents know where they stand. Their opinions are unwelcome, their advice is unheeded, and the fact that a majority of them are unhappy with the current system is of no consequence whatsoever.

In Mayor Bloomberg's New York, if you have enough money, and enough PR, democracy simply does not apply.

To Serve You Better

Mayor Mike has decided to put 10 school construction projects on hold. After all, only 48% of schools are overcrowded, and statistics are important nowadays. Clearly Mayor Mike is looking to improve his score and will not act until 100% of schools are overcrowded and crumbling to the ground.

As usual, this mayor's quest for perfection is admirable.

Can You Live Without Cable?

This guy may have to--Comcast is suspending service unless he immediately pays $0.00, which the company claims is past due. Personally, I'd write a check.

Let's Ignore the Issues and Focus on Merit Pay

Apparently, merit pay is not going to save the world after all. It appears that it is not the way of the world, and that the overwhelming majority of working people don't actually get it. It also appears there are unintended consequences, but didn't we already know that?

I mean, if you're offering me ten thousand bucks for a ninety-percent passing rate, what are the chances some of my less productive students won't suddenly have flashes of genius that alter my worldview immediately? Is there anyone who really thinks that young music teacher who's been meeting the principal at the Comfort Inn on Tuesday afternoons isn't going to be rewarded?

Here's the thing, though--no one's actually offered ten grand, as far as I know. It's more like three grand. I once read an article by a merit pay supporter suggesting it ought to be the price of a used car. Personally, if I'm going to whore myself out, I'd like to be highly compensated, thank you very much.

The thing is--I'm not in this to whore myself out, and anyone who is is probably too stupid to teach in the first place. This is a great job, an exciting job, a job where I meet people I'm thrilled to know. If you don't feel that way, consider teaching ESL like me. You'll meet people from all over the world.

In any case, even if I were in it for the money, my big mouth (evident all over the blog) would preclude my receiving any. Anyone who tells you big cash payouts won't corrupt people is naive or lying. Sure, we didn't go into this to get rich. But we do have families, and we do need to support ourselves.

So please, Barack Obama, Randi Weingarten, Joel Klein, Michelle Rhee, and all the various and sundry muckety-mucks who have a hand in the future of education, keep this in mind--

We need to be paid. If we wanted tips, we'd be working at the diner.

Thanks to Magical Mystical Teacher

Well, Shazam!

Waddya know? Part-time UFT President Randi Weingarten supports continuation of mayoral control, as well as continued mayoral domination of PEP.

Well, come on. Someone has to stand up for the rights of billionaires with no regard for the will of the people. Why shouldn't it be the President of the UFT? What do you expect her to do, run around asking for more pay and better working conditions?

How is that going to get her huzzahs from Rod Paige?

Mike Bloomberg, Practical Guy

Mayor Mike is hopping mad that people are going to emergency rooms just because they may have contracted the swine flu. Why do they have to go to such extremes? Wouldn't it be easier, for example, to have their personal physicians visit their brownstones? Aren't they putting themselves at even more needless risk by sitting in crowds of people coughing?

As Mayor-for-life, Michael Bloomberg has learned a thing or two. In fact, the prudent thing might be to go to work, have custodial staff double up stocks of tissues and hand sanitizers, and simply close your office door. Be sure to use your private restroom in the inner office rather than those open to staff. Have the cleaning lady scrub it down hourly, rather than just 12 times a day. Make sure the chef places the silver cover over your meals personally, rather than delegating to mere kitchen staff.

In fact, rather than staying home, you could always have your secretary ring up your private physician and have him visit you in the office. If worse comes to worst and you are sick, you could always have the pair of SUVs that shuttle you from the brownstone to your favorite subway stop take you back home. Perhaps then, and only then, you should call your personal physician.

With just these few simple measures, you protect not only yourself, but also whoever you invite into your private office. Why on earth don't these pain-in-the-neck residents just think this stuff through? It's all clear to the mayor.

Better Sorry than Safe

That seems to be Mayor Mike's motto. After all, it's just 1.1 million kids, and few of them are rich. Why bother closing the schools and losing all that cool state money? One of the things I often hear from the Tweedies is that the schools are for the benefit of the kids, not the adults. Therefore, apparently, since it's a mere adult people are mourning at today's funeral, there's no reason for concern.

Still, in my classes, attendance was down 20% today. I saw one kid, who was absent yesterday, walking around in a face mask. He said he was sick. I told him if that was the case, he needed to go home. Apparently he did, because he didn't show up to my class. Another student of mine said she was sick on Monday. I forced her to go to the medical office, and she returned three minutes later. But she hasn't been back since.

Another of my students showed up late to class today. She said her teacher had been trying to compel a sick boy to go to the medical office, but he'd refused, much to the teacher's distress. Eventually someone from administration gave her some support and removed the boy.

On Monday, there was not only soap, but toilet paper and paper towels in the trailer bathroom. I thought this was a response to concerns about the flu. Alas, yesterday and today there was no more paper. So much for wishful thinking. I've also heard that kids prefer the disgusting trailer bathrooms to those in the main building which, incredibly, are even worse.

Mayor Bloomberg ought to close down the schools, if for no other reason, to clean the filthy buildings so patently unfit for schoolchildren, or anyone (even if they don't happen to have millions of dollars). Will he do the right thing?

You never know--it could be the exception that proves the rule.